I write this as they change my dose of antidepressants. Doing something I never thought I would do and something I was so against. Navigating through the world of antidepressants is a scary thing. The world of trying to find what will work and what won’t make you want to hang yourself…. It’s a fine balance, a tight rope walk through the depression and anxiety praying and hoping you come out alive. 5 weeks in and I was leaning towards the dark side but thankfully adjustments were made.
I’m starting my next 16 week training for the RNR Montreal marathon and its hard to find the motivation to lace up my sneakers. All I can think about is why is my brain betraying me like this. The anxiety I’m having feels like I’m wearing a weight vest at all times and I can’t breathe like a rope is around my neck. It’s a strange existence to go though. I know others may feel the same way but that doesn’t make it any easier.
Maybe a run will help and maybe its the distraction I need.